A Line on How to Be Grateful!

Just this evening, bringing yet another basket of laundry up the stairs from the basement, I catch myself sighing, thinking, "Man, laundry is right up there with taxes and death, another sure thing!"!
I note the thought has a tone of "complaint" in it and I feel just a little ashamed for that.

I head out the back door to the deck where the clothesline awaits.   About a quarter of the way into the basket of freshly laundered fabrics I find myself quite enjoying this task at hand.  Truth be told, somehow I usually find I do.   It's not such a bad thing at all.

The clothesline in the beginning, empty, an emptiness longing to be filled!  The basket filled with fresh,  dampened clothes and linens, about to become an exhibit, a long line of visual pleasantry.   A light breeze will only add to the visual pleasure of colour, shape and form of a very routine effort that suddenly takes on a very artistically fulfilling life.

The very thing that seems like drudgery, suddenly provides grateful inspiration in what it and what it bears becomes in putting paint to canvas or words to paper!   The clothesline, Family Represent in daily life, routines, love bestowed, gifts/luxuries taken for granted.

How lovely, lucky me for I have clothes to wear, linens for beds we sleep in,  AND a line to hang them on after washing them clean with water at my own home. Then for me to enjoy a few moments watching them flap gently on a breeze and  become so happily inspired by, I am incredibly grateful and now shall write with such gratefulness upon a slip of paper and deposit it into my grateful jar.

I will confess, I may find it harder to think this way when our winters are bearing down so harshly upon us and I will most likely turn to the luxury of the modern day dryer, which too may offer some inspiring effects worthy of artistic outcomes.   If nothing artistically profound I shall then revel in the luxury of instant warmth !

Let's Talk Dirty!

Talking dirty could mean so many things, like....talking dirty in things we say that our mother's might have scolded us for, been disappointed in us for and wondering where we could have heard such things, it could mean we're avid gardener's totally sharing tips on quality soil tips for growth, perhaps we are avid vermicomposters?    Well none of those apply.  It's a confessional here.

At a time when we are hearing so much about "clean eating", yes I am here to talk dirty.    How is it I have become so conscious of when I am bucking the "clean eating" idea and about to go "dirty"?

Recently the term "clean eating" ringing in my ears, I had what I could only refer to as a "Dirty Day" of eating.    I am not the best example of a "clean eater" by any stretch of the imagination but in being conscious of my food choices; good and bad, do try to eat healthy, "junk" less and hope in the long run I will be a better example of better eating, nutrition wise and maybe even benefit my long term health.

The day I speak of was off to a good start with a bagel, thin smear of cream cheese, one cup of yogurt, and grapes.    Even Grapes have come into question as I have heard them referred to as "the dirty fruit"!  I'm learning and the learning continues as I strive to do what's best for myself and hope to influence hubby too but there is much to take in and I want to be realistic too in what I will, will want to change and what I will stick to.    Breakfast not too bad and then there was the lunch hour and as I see the establishment ahead but keep my cravings to myself it is only about 40 minutes later Hubby voices his own craving and you guessed it, the very craving I have avoided speaking of!   I am delighted and feel less guilty about my own craving for KFC in his having shared his!    It hits!  Once a year I find myself so craving the Colonels recipe and with less and less of these establishments in existence the desperation  to satisfy said craving rises!

The KFC feeding frenzy always ends the same, feeling like I need to immediately "wipe down" afterward.    Entering in, think I should have donned a dark cloak, dark glasses and proceeded with an altered voice in attempting to shroud my shame, but it's all really goooooood!

The evening, when while sitting all cozy with Hubby, watching a movie he mentions chips and ....heaven help me, pop!    There has been a couple of bottles tucked away in the depths of the "cellar way" and chips tucked into the back of the cupboard in the kitchen.   These used to be a common site on a Friday or Saturday night but now are seen about very seldomly and when announced on this night, my resistance is low.   O.K in all honesty there is NO resistance.    Coca Cola and chips.   I don't any longer truly enjoy pop, but coca cola and original chips, I revert to the crazy chip dipping in the coke behaviours!   It's been quite a day.

The "Dirty Day" behind me I go forth with a renewed desire to eat healthy and hope to make much better choices but I know I will relapse, cheat (myself), and WANT what I know is just that; a WANT, as opposed to a need; licorice, chocolate, cookies, gummi bears, etc.!     Oh heaven help me!  There is hope, right?!   Le sigh.

Into the tub....back to the 80's!

Last night following a, well, a very lazy day, somehow I really needed a long soak in an epsom infused bath!    It was a lazy day following a workout at physio for my shoulder.    I didn't touch my canvases, nor did I work at signs in the process of being produced, no house cleaning chores, nor writing blogs, updating manuscripts or ANYTHING!    I confess with some hesitation to having filled a day with ...coulda' shoulda' and just don't feel like it's!  

I hadn't intended such a lazy day or fully intended to have such a long soak in the tub, but remembered that I had this past weekend rediscovered the existence of my beloved sony walkman, which also held the much coveted Rick Springfield cassette; Working Class Dog, which necessitated a reacquaintance with both!

Oh Holy blissfulness!  It's equal to being led from a very busy city street, through a vacant alley, out into the quiet of a serene meadow.    I often have a difficult time with the attempt to indulge in a 'long soak' but this time, I let my hair down, put all thoughts aside; on average a gazillion "need to do" and of the household and daily routines nature.  
I found the meadow, right there in my bathroom....in the tub, through the retro reminiscence of sound waves travelling between ear buds in the form of great 80's vibes from heart throb Rick Springfield.  You can bet I will relish a day of hard work and accomplishments delved into simply just to justify another long soak while adorned by ear buds, walkman and retro tunes... and with Rick, so worth the wait!  Bring it!

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That Little Ditty About Jack and Diane

It isn't summer, it's barely feeling like a spring day on this particular day, but somehow it works just as if it were a warm summer day.

When I hear just such a song I want to roll down the window, let my hair blow freely and sing like nobody is listening!
Thursday coming home from work rolling along the 401 that song streams from the car radio and it feels like a summer day many years ago and for a few short moments it feels like I am much younger.
That song is "Jack and Diane" which for some reason makes me think of summer.   In writing this post realize it may be much more than that.

This song doesn't perhaps JUST remind me of summer, but of the "spring" of my life.   Summer, the epitome of carefree, footloose, fun in the sun, friends, friendships, first loves and long lingering wonderful days.   It's feeling that sense of everything is amazing and wonderful and imagining all the wonderful to come...cruisin' carefree, an ice cold coca cola, warm rays on your face, a day at the beach, attending a great summer concert where and when it seems the world is at it's very best.

That little ditty sure has a lot of power in the joy of hearing it and while I am no longer in the spring of my years teetering on the late summer of, I do look forward to the summer ahead and more of the "summer" ahead!  Many wonderful things ahead of me and doing it all with many friends, making new friends, family and of course the love of my life!    Just around the corner yet another summer season, so jump in, roll on and crank those tunes!

The Perogy Has the Power!

It's sure been a long ol' winter and for the first time in thirty years of being married to "a Plowman" this is the first year I have actually outwardly felt some measure of despair in winter.  
I have always loved winter, love building snowmen, love making snowangels, joining the children in a gleeful dance of joy at the sight of big fluffy flakes falling in thick masses from a beautiful winter's eve sky!

Recently while preparing our dinner including a favourite little yummy in a pot full of perogies, I looked into the pot to target a scoopful of said yummies and there looking up at me, a sign, a measure of encouragement and assurance in knowing all will be well and spring is just on the horizon was a little sunshiny-like smiling face on one of the perogies.

Hope was restored and I couldn't help but smile back and then after sprinkling it with chopped green onion, a dollup of sour cream and a tiny sprinkle of real bacon sent that smiley serving of hope into my tummy!    I smiled from the inside out and knew I had the power within' to make it through the rest of the winter, no matter what it has in store!    Thank you little smilin' perogy!

His day, my day another day celebrated!

Today is our son's birthday and for that reason I am celebrating doubly!    Of course I'm excited to celebrate the amazing young man he has become, but I'm excited to be here to celebrate with him; as we did Friday night and will again tomorrow on family day!  That's right, celebrating that I AM HERE and that I am here to celebrate!

It's a day I will never forget for the blessing that the arrival of our son was and a day I can't forget 23 years after his arrival for the words that made me feel anything but blessed.    Hearing the "C" word...CANCER made my head spin, literally as I returned to my car that day in a dizzy, weak in the knees state of mind.
I am today 3 years post  cancer diagnosis.   It's been quite an adventure and while I may curse cancer's arrival to my life I may also be grateful for the focus, realizations and reflection it has brought to me!

I could go on and on but tonight I'm watching the SNL 40th Anniversary show and that alone makes me grateful ....all the years I watched it and that I am here watching it tonight!   No Way!   WAY!

In 2012 I had 122 blog entries, so on that note cancer certainly provided plenty for me to write about, the GOOD, the BAD, the UGLY and the TRIUMPH in making it through it all.   Today I know of an Incredibly courageous, determined and inspirational young girl who celebrates the end of her chemotherapy and just keeps moving forward letting cancer know, she RULES!    To that beautiful young girl and to everyone fighting the fight, keep your chin up and celebrate every day!

Loo Loo Skip to the Loo....The Real Poop!

I've witnessed the "before" and heard so many variations including those who would quickly say it's "the worst thing Iv'e ever experienced", which even without having experienced questioned that summary, but it's relevant!  Mention the topic to anyone and you are sure to be gifted the "poop" of the scenario they themselves have "survived" or a second hand dramatization shared through via a friend or a "friend" of a friend of theirs!

Did you guess I am post colonoscopy?  First ever and the procedure itself, well, I have no recollection or sense of whatsoever!    Of course yes as expected I do recall and have some story to recollect when it comes to the preparation for said procedure.    I understand too that over just the last few years the details of the prep have changed somewhat as well.   When my husband was "prepping" for his, it was necessary to begin the dosing early in the afternoon the day before the procedure, but now it is requested that you begin at 7 P.M the evening before.    I have heard about the "jugs" of greatly unpleasantly thick liquid which one had previously had to chug back as per the "dosing", now it's like taking the orange supplement Emergen C, with a little more "fizz"!   The "dosing" even comes in a delightful little box-a sunny delight; which the pharmacy employee cashing me through recognized immediately!    While we joked about it and "the fun" I was in for, I'm not shaken.   

You just have to plan to hang out fairly closely to the "facility" and pay attention to the signals your body sends out!    My plan much like the one we initiated a few years ago for Hubby was to have a couple of movies lined up, an approved selection of fluids and of course be sure there is a ready and varied supply of magazines available upon ones arrival to the "facility"!    With the addition of netflix there was of course a great selection of movies available to me via my laptop and while cozied up in bed awaiting the "signals"!    I only had to "eject" my cat from the cozy of my lap once!

Another new "bonus" to the procedure at hand came up as the Anesthetist offered me the chance to see the final stage of the colonoscopy "LIVE" onscreen before me, if I should like!    I know I looked like a deer in the headlights and then asked him to repeat the option to me as I was a little stunned and amazed at what he had just said.    He repeated and I slowly but happily replied, "Sure, that's cool!" and a very short time later off we went. 

"Come on in Catherine", he says as we enter the surgical suite,  with the same welcome of ones invitation to "come on down" on the Price Is Right.

I don't feel nervous at all ...and next thing I know I hear my name again...

"Catherine, would you like a coffee or some juice...and the doctor is going to see you in just a minute."

I realize this is where they waken you and (try to) get you going and where I always want to keep sleeping.    Then I believe I did HEAR my doctor's voice and I THINK I did SEE him, but it's a little vague.  There is a paper to to say the same but I think it went like this....

"Catherine,  the colonoscopy went well and things look great.   There were no polyps and we'll see you in ten years."

Hubby is apparently retrieving and warming the car so I dress quickly and then am rolled away from the day surgery unit by a lovely hospital volunteer.

Honestly the whole experience was not so bad at all and certainly worth a very small amount of "inconvenience" in the end; no pun intended.   

*Footnote: Apparently I enjoyed the sedation greatly and I am sad to say I missed the "LIVE" Reality TV Like opportunity to watch the last stage of the procedure.   Sigh.  Maybe next time?

https://www.cancercare.on.ca/pcs/screening/coloscreening/?WT.mc_id=/colorectalscreening

Seriously, but LOL...Tuning In for Colon Health!

Monday, Monday, so good to me!   This morning I was of the mind that one week from tomorrow; Monday, I would be at the hospital for my colonoscopy.   I will be enjoying the benefits of a scheduled colonoscopy; that versus an unscheduled colonoscopy did not enter my mind.  In thinking it was a Monday appt., somehow the song "Monday, Monday" kept playing over in my thoughts.  Singing this tune you might think I actually delighted in going for the procedure...Monday Monday so good to me (?)!    It is actually taking place one week from Tuesday, but the "prep" WILL be underway that Monday evening!

While a colonoscopy isn't anything one might excitedly or enthusiastically sign up for, having such procedures available and preventative in offering insight to the health of my colon is certainly worthy of my gratefulness and especially after my personal experience with the "Big C"!

With melanoma, once you have been deemed N.E.D (No Evidence of Disease) following surgeries and prior to being approved if necessary, for adjuvant/immunotherapy treatment, there are no further scans, etc. .  While I do have ongoing cancer care in attending bi-annual skin checks with my dermatologist, annual check ups with my surgeon who had done both pre-treatment surgeries and an annual checkup with my oncologist I must confess to wishing there was a full scan annually as well.  
It's a wait and see, wait and watch for any unusual symptoms, for any visible lesions on the skin surface; recurrence.

The colonoscopy itself is as I've been told, nothing to fret and apparently the sedation is like a gift of the best sleep you've never had!   I understand and have witnessed the inconvenience of the "Prep" in the day before the procedure as the worst part of it.   My husband has had a colonoscopy and the song that comes to mind in reminiscing the experience would have to be...."Loo Loo, Skip to the Loo, Skip to the Loo my Darling!"...or RUN perhaps!

With that said, once all done I imagine leaving the day behind singing out, "Goodbye Ruby Tuesday...",  and better that song comes to mind when many less dignified tunes/names for the day might come to mind!

https://www.cancercare.on.ca/pcs/screening/coloscreening/?WT.mc_id=/colorectalscreening

*Adjuvant therapy, also called adjuvant care, is treatment that is given in addition to the primary, main or initial treatment. The surgeries and complex treatment regimens used in cancer therapy have led the term to be used mainly to describe adjuvant cancer treatments.

*Immunotherapy (also known as Biological therapy) stimulates your immune system to help it fight the cancer. Biological medications are the same as, or similar to, natural immune chemicals your body produces. Available immunotherapy include interferon alpha, interleukin-2, and Yervoy™.

Of ICING!

Sometimes you need a little something, something, not celery, not the chips n' guacamole, not the cookie,
but suddenly, somehow...Icing!  Oh, not the sports kind of icing as in hockey. My apologies if that was an exciting thought for you!   I'm talking about the "icing on the cake" and not figuratively; though that phrase is always a welcome thought to any situation, but literally the icing on a cake kind of icing!  

Icing, a saving grace when you're desperate for some sinful indulgence.  When there just isn't anything of the sinful category in your larder when you REALLY need there to be and it's just not in the realm of possibilities to go out for said items.

Icing is quickly made for indulgence with just three basic ingredients!   Icing sugar, butter and milk will create a basic icing and if you have specific tasty needs you can add any flavouring you wish!  Cocoa on hand...chocolate icing, lemons...lemon icing, and so on!    This is not an earth shattering, high priority kind of post but I just thought I'd share.    I will have you know too, this is NOT one of those "desperate for some sinful indulgence" evenings and especially as I am about to tuck in for the night but more of an FYI, because it's bad but in a pinch, it's good!

Monday, the new Wednesday!

I recall; to some degree, many years ago when downtown on a Wednesday one would find a good portion of the shops closed at noon.    It wasn't odd, it didn't seem out of the question, it was just the way it was.

Just this past Monday I was downtown and found many of the shops closed for the day.    My first thought was that somehow I was confused and had not paid attention to what day it was.   Then as I checked a store schedule on their door, it came to me it was in fact Monday.

I understand perhaps Mondays are not a very busy day and especially when most shops are now open on Sundays.   I don't blame shops one bit.    If Mondays are in fact a very slow day that would in turn make for very long hours for those working.   A busy day has a tendency to go by very quickly and a slow day passes very slowly; that for just about any field of work.

While some may not like changes as they come and go among our businesses, we all know change is just a part of life.    Running a business is a 24/7 kind of enterprise and one always has to be on their toes, growing and changing with the times, balancing life/family with demands and following trends!

Sidetracked at the tracks!

This may sound a bit like a gambler's confession!     I've been to a Casino once and to the racetrack; Kawartha Downs my one and only*once and while I could confess to the excitement and sudden rush of "I feel lucky" this is not that!    I will confess that it takes VERY little for me to be "sidetracked" at any given moment and in the midst of just about anything!   "OH, Shiny something..."!

Today as I tried very hard to pay close attention to the time on returning from a long walk lakeside; a doctors appointment next on the schedule, and about to turn to head home I looked ahead to see a stream of most intriguing vehicles lined up and slowly making their way west along the tracks near Cameco.    I was suddenly "sidetracked" and turned up Alexander St. to get a closer look.   I looped back, grabbed my camera and parked the car.   I had never seen anything like this before...a convoy of rail capable vehicles.   They resemble the familiar yellow machinery we are used to seeing in the yard of the works dept. ; like the much  heralded sight of the beloved snowplow clearing our streets in this very winter!    I walk closer and begin snapping away, trying to get my preferred angles, up close and that perspective but without getting in the way of the gentleman operating the hose for the gas line from the tanks of fuel to each of the machines/vehicles as they make their way to him along the tracks.

I can't help myself and finally approach one of the fellows; looking friendly enough, and ask where they are headed and what work they are doing.    He is friendly thankfully and tells me they're "going in", they are clearing the tracks for a scheduled train passing and they have been laying new rails!   Oh, how interesting and I tell him I've never seen such a convoy and he then tells me there are about one dozen machines lined up here at this time.   Plenty happening at the tracks but then one also notices the many trucks parked at various points in working with the operation as well.   It's quite intriguing!    This is just one such instance where I am swiftly heading home or to any other destination when something catches my attention and suddenly necessitated a full stop!    It is for this reason I always have a camera of one form or another with me in the car!   Hubby knows all about my "sidetracks", all too well.  Today at the tracks, tomorrow who knows!