Thursday, September 21, 2017

...Not Quite so Nearly Naked.

So there I was seeking out a washroom, while strolling short corridors within' the diagnostic imaging department in a fabulously fashionable gown...actually two.   Two gowns.   How wonderful of someone to have finally decided it is not terribly dignifying to wonder about, whilst ones buttocks with their sideways smile, make an unannounced appearance directly behind you, ahead of everyone else.  
Being asked; by random people in a meeting, "Are you looking for your clothes?", made me considerably grateful I was clothed in some degree at that very moment.
Someone was clever enough to initiate the "first gown goes front facing and second gown rear facing" ensemble which gives one the extra layer of security in feeling not quite so nearly naked.
My clothes safely kept in a nearby change cubicle and I, safely kept in two gowns.

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

The Season made me do it...again!

Saturday morning, showering, changing the towels; retrieved from the linen closet, in the hall, I realize something is happening.    I realize it as soon as I go to closet, then open the door. It begins.
The report to authorities reads like, "I didn't know I was going to do it, it just happened!", I explain and then, "Honestly I have no idea what came over me!".
Clearly the last part of the statement is a lie.    It's a lie, because I know after sooooo many years of seasons arriving and departing, this is not an uncommon occurrence.

Almost officially Autumn and despite being very weary and with soooo many things gnawing at my thoughts, it happens, whether I  really WANT to or not, a rage of epic cleaning proportions occurs. An inner clock of sorts, ringing like there's no tomorrow and it won't stop until I pay it mind, like an unspoken duty only I (suddenly) am made aware of internally.  
Hubby is like, "Had you planned to do this, this morning?".
I reply, "No, no....", feeling on the verge of tears.    I had not planned this.   Like an illness suddenly having taken over my being, by every inch, I am fully involved.   Lost to an unexpected event.   It's like the weather event, the weather forecast didn't actually forecast, it just happened.   It's a love/hate relationship with the change of season.    My body like someone taken over by demonic powers, gives itself over to the deed.
In the end, somehow all is wonderfully zen as I look upon the results of this unplanned takeover.

Once again, the season's change made me do it, but oddly, I'm into it!   Viva la season!!!!

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Tying One On.

Since February visions of summer and what it "might be" began to 'dash away'.   The earliest hint of a possible change showing itself before Christmas.

Well, it's nearly summer's end and two months post surgery for my Hubby.   Of course there are a few long term side affects; while not permanent, which he struggles with but he's a trooper and working hard to push past all of that and carry on.

Hubby was diagnosed in February with prostate cancer, following 3 PSA tests and a biopsy.  An especially scary time for him looking ahead, but as well for myself like a recurring nightmare.   The timeline, far too familiar and those words "...well, unfortunately'...",  weighed so heavily upon us both.  Not at all what we had expected; but never what you expect to hear at any rate.

In part of his personal healing process Hubby had his first tattoo!    He has never indicated before that he would like one, but not long after his surgery and beginning to reflect on the experience he announced to me he was going to get a tattoo honouring his victory in the battle!   He sports the two tone blue necktie for Prostate Cancer Canada on his arm and I must say, I find it rather sexy!   His tattoo is a reminder of his strength even when he felt his weakest.  I appreciate how proud he feels in coming through this experience and isn't afraid to talk about it with others, which in turn may just help someone else.    I'm happy to have been his support and caregiver after he was most certainly my biggest support through my own experience; sometimes literally the shoulder I cried on.

And now, we raise a glass to moving forward, healing in our own way, living life, and making more plans, we say BRING IT, we'll take it on!

* As a footnote, Tattoo's are one's personal expression on a canvas that is their own.  For my Husband it means a great deal to have added this design to his person.    His first tattoo and it carries much pride in winning at his fight against cancer!

Sunday, July 30, 2017

Sometimes you just gotta!

Speaking of shoes and the next thing, someone named Chuck Taylor is suddenly part of the conversation and I think,  "Who's Chuck?"!

Early spring of this year my daughter and I were having a much overdue day together and as well as just making the most of the drive itself decided to drop in on the lovely Bobcageon, the small but very picturesque setting with some lovely shops for the discerning shopper!   I love Bobcageon for it's little locks and all of the lovely boats coming and going and how the lock is nestled right in the midst of the shops.

On making note of the shops there I mention the shoe shop and how I think one day I might consider buying a pair of hightop shoes, just because I think it would be "cool", you know just for kicks!
"Well then you should, today!", my daughter resounds.    Of course I tell her it's just a silly thought, that I would just do it for fun!

We go through the first couple of shops and one leasds right into another.    Turning the corner, my daughter says, "There's what you are looking for, Chuck's!".

"Who?", I say and she reiterates "Chuck's, Chuck Taylors, ...Converse"!   I get it, Converse shoes are Chuck Taylor's shoes.    The light just went on, o.k., gotcha!

I simply wasn't planning on such a purchase today, not something so bright, kid-like, impractical, silly... FUN!   I ponder out loud, "what would I wear them with, where would I wear them?".    At first it's just my daughter and I discussing my every thought and her telling me why I should get them, then the sales staff returns and she joins in as well.   Back and forth we go with them telling me why I should go ahead and just DO IT!   My daughter is quite prepared to buy them for me if I don't make the purchase.    I have a pair of distressed denims I created that will be just the perfect pairing with these ...LOL, putting together an "alternative" outfit!  I might be able to do this!

I imagine the revisiting of this moment many times over should I not make the purchase today.    I then also imagine revisiting this moment throughout the years ahead and how much fun it was in picking the bright red shoes, instead of the practical, non-funky feeling black shoe and in being reminded of the road trip there and back.   I love the chance to 'step out of my norm' and play big!

I don't normally Chuck, but when I do I feel rather "cool" and am reminded life is short, so sometimes Chuck's over a practical loafer are just the ticket!   :)

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

...This Holiday Stinks..."...And behind curtain no. #1!" !

Sometimes you VACATION sometimes you STAYCATION, this year is more of the latter.    We'll take a day here and there or an overnight once or twice, but overall this summer is more a staycation.

All in all and everything aside; EVERYTHING, we're trying to be really thankful.

Before the summer had begun, actually last fall it, was mentioned our Septic Tank needed to be replaced, at least by the summer.   I followed that with a, "Whaaaaaat?", and then, "No, no, no, that can't be?"!   It just seems to be a theme of sorts this year!
My husband replied, "I know, it's shitty isn't it?".  
I'm thinking, well, YES, it is shitty and that's without even thinking about the fact it's shitty punny!
The whole notion this is how things are going really stinks.   I know, another punny knowing the context...or content!

Of course the  #$@&%*! was the first thing that came to my mind and may have slipped across my lips and into the atmosphere, but then I settled with the reality that that, is just the way it is.  

So the day comes round and the old tank is emptied; with very little stench in the air,  and over the course of the day the new one installed.   With it all unfolding before us and our visiting family, it all makes for an "exciting" day of sorts; yes of sorts.    The goings on makes our home the centre of interest on our street!   OK, there are only two homes on our street and this particular week we'd provided all of the interest.   One day prior we had a moving truck in our driveway as our son and his partner prepared to head off to new adventures.

I have to give the workers on the job credit as in between each load of dirt taken away they have to wait for the truck to return to proceed, just adding to the shitiness of the days work.  You know, sitting around doing nothing and not being able to stop yourself from thinking there is anything you would rather be doing!   A long day.

At the end of it all, despite the disruption to our yard, home, LOL...toileting practices, and yes, vacation plans coming to fruition, it's now done and we have a shiny new, empty(ish) tank installed and a new canvas of fresh disruptedness to play with!    OH, and that first flush....excitement and excited relief, it all works!    HAPPY  STAYCATION!


Aaaaaand, ....

OH t's a Brand New Septic Tank!!!!!

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, WOW...and I thought this would be so shitty!!!!!

Monday, July 17, 2017


I see by my last post that it's been QUITE some time since my last post!    Honestly I hadn't thought it to be THAT long ago!   If you should happen to follow my here in any degree and by chance had wondered when I might post again, I do apologize for the wait.   It certainly isn't for lack of blog fodder, quite the opposite and I suppose living through life experiences and being caught up in the moments passing, not hiding out, just finding oneself too busy to write about them.   It may be that I was simply too lazy...sadly, a little bit of that so true.

Along the daily path of this life I can't begin to count how many times either quietly in my own mind or loudly I announce, "That's blog worthy right there!",  I have had pause to realize there is much to blog about on most days.    I've had some wonderful days since that last addition, wonderful experiences, but also some not so wonderful experiences nor such counted as wonderful days.    I often say to myself, "...but that's life!", realizing life is an ongoing tour of hills n' valley's, great days and not so great days and I'll take each as they come.    While we are cruising those hills and valleys; literally and not so literally, time rolls right on by and of course there are things we plan to do, hope to do and realize some we never quite did so we carry on, make note and try our best to plan to accomplish the unaccomplished, or think we might.

I am here now and making a vow to write in this beloved blog from where I might be at the time, at least once a week!    I work best under pressure so this sounds like a solid possibility!
Hang in there, life keeps happening so lots to share!
'Til then! 

Friday, October 14, 2016

What's the Prognosis? Dr. Who?

Filling out the form full of questions about my medical history, including "what is your ultrasound for", I hesitate.    I'm not completely sure what I'm there for.    Even going over the list of upcoming appointments I am a little unsure whether this ties into one of the other appt.'s or what!

Not long and I am just about finished filling out the questions and the Ultrasound Tech calls me in.    When she asks me my doctor's name I give her the name of my family doctor and she says, Oh, it's not Dr. F?  
"Oh, oh yes, from Peterborough.", I reply, "That's him, that's why I'm here!"!   We both laugh.   On the sheet I had written 'chest' where they ask what the ultrasound is for; another spot under observation. I followed "chest" with a question mark because I simply wasn't sure which follow-up this was!  This time last year I had gone under the knife for a benign tumour in my neck; Oct. 1st and this was THAT follow up before my next follow up appointment with the specialist!

Well now I know, July/August  and Oct. to Dec. I have enough Dr. visits to make ME question why I'm Here or there, when at other times I have felt certain the Dr.'s might be questioning my arrival, though they have assured me otherwise!

Saturday, October 1, 2016

A Mother's Daughter.

Tonight while visiting my parents, there was that moment when my Mom gently tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear.   It stayed with me as I walked to my car.
That moment you (again) realize just how precious she is to you and you are to her.   I hope my own daughter realizes that's exactly how it is.   Daughters or sons, your dad or your mom.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Losing My Head

Sorting out the first item of intended business I then followed up with the second item on my intended agenda while at the pharmacy.   The second a little more complicated in sharing my confusion with regards to a received message from my doctor's office.   The pharmacist, very patient with me in trying to make all points understood and then make summary of where the problem lay.   I am grateful to have been understood, thank the pharmacist, tell her to take care and head for the parking lot.
She calls out, "Were you going to wait for that?", meaning the "first item of intended business".  
I turn and come back.

"Oh, yes, I am going to wait!", I say.
I prepare to sit and wait, then turn back once again, "Can you imagine if we actually had to remember to attach our heads?".  
We both laugh.   I think to myself, it's hard enough on a good day but; seriously, no laughing matter considering the "other" days!!!

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Dishing the Dirt!

Gardening for any length of time inevitably requires that I wash my feet afterward, you know...everything makes it's way through your shoes, socks and in between every toe!  Toe jam at it's best.

Undressing to take a shower, I undo the clasp on my bra and a dusting of dirt particles falls from inside said apparel.   I think, "Whoa, you might just be a hardcore gardner!"!   Well, in my own way of course and now you know what else I have to wash!!!

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Bra-vo!...or Not!

I don't think I've ever carried my cell phone in my bra; well perhaps once.   It just seems awkward and not very practical; especially if you are a furnace most of the time.   It's been pointed out that should you pack your phone there, you may incur damage due to sweating.   OK, honestly this past two weeks I haven't carried anything in my bra, not even the intended cargo. It's true, circumstances of recent have necessitated a more liberal approach to my wardrobe choices and I've been braless!

Today I worked hard at choosing what to wear, taking into consideration the heat I am carrying with the "medical affliction" and the HEAT I am producing via my other ongoing affliction and in considering the continuing saga that is the weather theme of Summer of 2016!   I finally settled on a dress I have enjoyed a few times and the upper styling is similar to that of the good ol' Swiss Chalet uniforms for the lucky lady servers back in the day!    Without a bra however it seems to create an obvious display of cleavage!   Not really me, but I have to be more concerned with comfort, especially when I am barely straying from the house.  That's settled!  I carry on with my day.  I am sorting through our music collection and realize I have some cassettes I haven't enjoyed in a very long time and head upstairs to fold laundry.

Our daughter pops in after work and gives me a once over and a smirk as she finds me upstairs  donning ear buds and singing my heart out to some tunes from my past glory days.    She says, "What's that?"
"Oh, " I say smiling back, "It's a walkman!"
"Um, don't you have an ipod you could use, or isn't there a clasp?" she replies.
"No clasp, it broke and I do, but I'm not sure where it is and today I found these old cassettes!".
She just looks at me and with almost a laugh and definitely smirking, she carries on.

I want to mention to her, ya' it's just like the cell phone thing!   I get it, sort of.   Either way, it's holstered!

When I return to "society" I will be holstering everything else once again!
BTW, I dont' really see menopause as an affliction, it just feels like it at times!   I beg for your understanding.

...Not Quite so Nearly Naked.

So there I was seeking out a washroom, while strolling short corridors within' the diagnostic imaging department in a fabulously fashio...