Saturday, April 21, 2012

A Restless night of tosses, turns and tears of joy and sadness

I'm up having bid the mover's good bye as they head to Toronto to pack up our daughters things in prep for her final week at school.
Last night was a restless night for me as I attempted to toss and turn, and while doing so had to rearrange the "support pillow" with each toss and turn.   My "gimp" side hurting with each go, but I continuously and desperately made attempts to enjoy at least a brief time laying in that old familiar way.   At one point I ventured back to my own bed and attempted some form of spooning with John, but sadly it didn't last long, just too uncomfortable as of yet.   I miss him.   I have to commend Dash our dog for quickly moving to the end of the bed in his own sweet gesture to give me at least a chance to be comfortable back in my own digs.   Oh well, with any luck I WILL have this tube removed today and that alone should help in granting me much more comfort while sleeping!
I had such a mix of thoughts and emotions going through me in trying to get to sleep last night.   Tears interrupted each almost successful "near sleep".   That's when I really needed to be with hubby and have him close to me.
I'm going to go back up to bed and watch a movie and plan to shower about a half hour before Michelle from Home Care arrives.
Maybe I'll watch a tear jerker and let the tears reign!


YAY, the Drain is out!  Today it finally happened!  Upon emptying the drain/pump last night and this morning I was happy to record very low amounts.   The final three recorded levels at 10 ml., 5 ml. and 10 ml.'s!    I assured Michelle I was not up to fudging the numbers!   She laughed and said, well then we can proceed in removing it!  Yay...it DID hurt and I was not happy with the way that felt but she was great and it was quick!   I DID lay down in order I be prepared for any chance of passing out.   Just thinking about pulling it out made me a little light headed.  Imagination IS a wonderful thing...MOST of the time!
Once out I am really rather shocked to see just what was tucked into my chest!  Yyyyyyyuck!....the ventilated portion is the size of a 5-6 inch tv remote and then an inch or two of tube from that and then stitched into place at the opening in ones underarm.   The hole will heal over in a few short days and in the meantime Home Care will be back to monitor the healing and at some point soon when it appears to be closed over and nice and clean will release me from their care.
I don't know about you but seeing this little wonder amazed and freaked me out a little.   I am intrigued by the science and medical wonders in all of this...something to focus on despite everything!

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