Saturday, February 25, 2012

...Where you never imagine you'll be - The "c" Word.

From Feb. 15th,  I have been writing every day.   That I write every day may not seem like a big deal, but presently for me it is a very big deal.   Many people write daily, including my Dad, as a friend attested to just yesterday, if nothing else he will have recorded the days weather.  I do like to write but have never imagined that I might one day be writing because I am suddenly one of so many included in a specific group of people, those who fall into the "c" category, writing about the "C" word; Cancer.  I have Melanoma.
I may just end up being one of the lucky ones but like everyone else there is much waiting in truly knowing where you stand in your full diagnosis.    March 9th I will have surgery where the surgeon will do a large excision and a sentinel lymph node biopsy and if I am lucky, that will be the last of it...the melanoma will have been eradicated.   I will know one week to ten days following the surgery.
There is a post for each day since Feb. 15th.
From where I am, it's a "circus" of emotions, all over the map and the "c" word is everything you never wanted to feel.
I like that, a "circus" of emotions.

It's real.

Cold bites at my feet, I shiver.
Everyone is near, but I feel alone.
Sorrow  calls again.
There must be a mistake, because this doesn't feel real.
My son is right, Cancer is a bitch.

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